I’ve had some of the most interesting few weeks in September. Like… I can’t even begin to explain how much stuff has happened. It doesn’t necessarily mean that things have happened to me but, I can admit that I’ve done some things I regret. “Boooooo!” to the regret word. **TRUTH: Life is full of regrets – whether people actually say that they regret something or not.
I just want people to understand that just because your friend is going through a storm, doesn’t mean you have to go through it with him or her. I think we find guilt in “not being there” or not being able to “relate” to a situation we feel we’d never experience. What makes matters worse is when you start to believe that your friends aren’t aware of you being spread thin.
EVERYONE has their own life to live. You won’t always be there and you won’t always understand. They won’t care about what you have to do and they’ll continue to feel like you must run on their time. If you like your time isn’t being respected – say something. If you feel like you’re being taken for granted – say something. If you don’t want to put up with trying to help figure out possible solutions for other people’s problems – say something. YOU don’t have to do and act when you friends want you to.
Nonetheless, I took the initiative to do some self evaluation like I talked about in my last post. I thought it would be good to see what I do opposed to me evaluating others. Believe me when I say that I’ve realized quite a few things about myself, that I swore up and down, I would never do or say. Wow. When you ACTUALLY take the time to acknowlege your flaws, you find some comfort in knowing what you should be working on. I’m a huge critic, so anything that I say and do, I personally feel like a bad seed or bad influence on those around me. *sigh*
Take this as a lesson. Find ways to express yourself. Remember that you have the right to remain an individual, but also remember that you could be a better person AND receive the understanding you’ve been looking for. It takes TWO to Tango. You have to work on yourself FIRST – then you can help other people. Stop getting wrapped up in the wrong life.